Cymbalta Beware

For those of you who have spoke to me in the last week or so, you may have noticed that somethings not quite right. Well, it's not. 

Several months ago, I was fortunate enough to temporarily have two health insurances. I saw a new rheumotologist and was prescribed several medications, one of which is Cymbalta. Cymbalta is regularly prescribed to help treat the pain associated with Fibromyalgia as well as nerve pain in those with diabetes. The effects of the Cymbalta, along with the other new meds I started, were quickly noticable. There were a lot of negative side effects the first month, but they eventually tapered off. My pain decreased and my mobility increased, both big pluses. After so long in such intense pain, it was a nice change. I noticed that emotionally I seemed to be shut off, but the relief was worth it to me at that point in time. 

My circumstances changed and I no longer had two insurance policies to cover my prescriptions. I had to stop my meds since we could not afford to refill them. The first to go was a medication that was created to lower blood pressure. It was prescribed to me for my Reynaud's Phenomena and worked fabulously! My hands and feet improved almost immediately! I noticed the changes when I quit taking the med after only two days. I was saddened to have the pain, tingling, stinging and other sensations return to my hands and feet. 

The next med to go was the Cymbalta. I begin to taper myself off of it since I figured anything that messes with brain chemicals probably shouldn't be stopped cold turkey. Yet, no matter how I tried to gradually wean myself, it seemed it wasn't gradual enough. I only had a limited supply of meds so I had to wean or would be faced with quitting cold turkey. 

Weaning myself off Cymbalta has been worse then when I got clean as a teenager from illegal drugs and alcohol. It's been worse then nicotine and caffeine withdrawl. I almost feel at times that I'm dying. The thing is, it's not really a physical problem that's driving me crazy. Sure, the pain has increased quickly and tremendously. Some days I know my pain is worse then when I started taking the Cymbalta! But, it's the other "stuff" going on that is making everything so unbearable. Below is a list of what I'm experiencing: 

Nasuea

Extreme food swings: Feeling of starving one minute and repulsed by food the next

Intense dreams 

Waking and having no idea where I am

Complete disconnect at times that makes me think maybe I'm really in the hospital in a coma or highly         medicated for some reason

Disorientation....it's hard to explain but it's almost like suddenly, my brain is shot full of electrical impulses and goes instantly dead. It then resets and I can continue on. 

Dizziness

Inability to walk or balance self

Intense "fluttering" in ears. Feels like something is inside my ears and vibrating/fluttering rapidly and forcefully. 

Twitches in body, face, eyes, mouth, even my tongue twitches. 

Inability to spell, type, write, etc (this is taking me at least 25 times longer then normal)

Extreme emotions and feelings of hopelessness, helplessness, rage, confusin, fear, sadness, etc

Extreme agitation and restlessness.....I feel like I HAVE to do something but when I get up to do something it seems that nothing will work! 

Memories of past events with full and complete recollection. When it happens, the entire event is clear to me....smells, breezes, colors, everything as if I'm in that moment. (If a drug that did just that could be invented there would be one huge market for it)

Lack of concept of time

Complete memory loss of some events happening during the day

Losing composure (crying that completely comes out of nowhere and won't stop....also laughing, rage, and other emotions that seem to come out of nowhere and completely dominate me)

Tremors, loss of muscle strength

Bowel issues (no detail required)

Flucating temperatures.....freezing to burning up to freezing again. 

Sense of.....well, I'm not sure how to put it. It's like I'm consciously aware in the back of my mind somewhere that I'm conscious, but everything seems so surreal that it doesn't seem possible.

I could go on and on but another one of the issues I'm having is I forget what I wrote as soon as I wrote it. So, I have to keep scrolling back up to see what I wrote. I also lose the thoughts before I can put them down. 

Tonight I decide to do some research cause quite frankly, I was getting downright scared! Come to find out, many many many people are complaining about similar withdrawl issues! They even have nicknames for some of the issues, like "Brain Zap". Realizing that these type of withdrawl symptoms are typical is quite a wake up to me. Sure, temporarily I didn't mind the lack of emotional disconnect if it meant a decrease in the extreme pain I'd been experiencing. The pain had lasted so long and been so intense I had to have some kind of relief. However, if this medication routinely and typically causes these types of withdrawl symptoms.........what exactly did this stuff do to me when I was on it?? What long term side effect will there be?? How long will I have to go through this withdrawl? 

I want to let all my fellow Fibromites know.................if you to are taking this med.............please don't stop it immediately! I can't imagine how horrible it must be to stop cold turkey. I thought the initial side effects were bad, but had I known this was what I would face now, I'd have never taken this stuff!

I know that without medications I'm headed down a nasty road. However, I'm happy to be off Cymbalta no matter what relief it gave me. I'll take the nasty road that I must travel ............. but it's gonna be with my own emotions, my own thoughts, my own brain..........not this jumbled, twisted, electrically zapped brain these withdrawl symptoms has put me through.