I sent Him a message (the one I'd dated on and off, the one that wants me back, the one that introduced me to my inner freak). I explained to him that I could not, in good conscious, keep the cell phone he had given me to use because I was trying to make things work with my recent ex. (To put it in perspective, the guy I was trying to make it work with said I should keep the phone and ride it out as long as possible and just not tell the other guy about "us").
He replied that I needed to keep it. That I needed it. That, if all else, to at least keep it 30 days until my financial situation improved.
A man that has told me he cares about me. A man that has said he wants me back. A man that has told me that my happiness is most important, even if it is found with someone else.
Yet, he wants me to keep the phone even when I'm pursuing the relationship I've been in the last 9 months.
Part of me wants to say..... "Damn, what a MAN!"
The other part of me realizes that for 9 months I"ve thought that often about the man I was dating.......and now it seems the majority of it was merely manipulation. That he'd go to no end to do what he knew would work to get his way, even if it was out of character for him.
I don't trust my own judgments or decisions.
AT ALL.
Not when it comes to relationships, men, or dating.
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